True love from budhsim

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TRUE LOVE

MOST OF THE love we have is possessive: it’s about

the self. That is not true love; it is self-love. When you

see someone who attracts you that feeling is not about

the person. We like the person because we have a good

feeling inside of us when he or she is around. The good

feeling is all about us. As a result, we want to possess

that person. But what we really want is the good

feeling—not the person! It is an important distinction.

If love is only about the self, then this relationship

will not last. Maybe you feel stale or bored. The initial

excitement and infatuation wears off. When the person

can no longer give you that good feeling, what do you

do? You change partners.

If we are able to start relationships with friendliness

and loving-kindness, love will develop. You will feel a

sense of closeness, a softness and tenderness. That is

when we truly open up. We are able to embrace and

accommodate. We become more understanding and

accepting. This love is a form of kindness. It is not only

about caring, protecting, giving—there is also in it

forgiveness and acceptance. You accept the person

whole. You see their strengths and weaknesses. You

relax. Then you are able to open your heart and mind

and accept them.

That is a true love.

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