Thea writting review 2 pot

Verb Tenses

Unless there is a very good reason for doing otherwise,

the same tense should be used throughout your essay.

You may use perfect tenses when appropriate, but try

to avoid using future, past, and present in one para￾graph. See whether you can find the tense mistakes in

the following paragraph.

Uniforms cost no extra money for teachers and

administrators, yet the benefits are great. Because

there is less competition in school, teachers and

administrators report that there are fewer fights,

less bullying, and fewer complaints from the stu￾dents. Instead, principals and teachers were able to

use uniforms to build school pride and loyalty.

Administrators and teachers will be able to concen￾trate on what they love to do most, teach, instead of

dealing with problems from children and parents.

The first part of the paragraph is in present tense.

The past tense verb were able in the third sentence

should be changed to the present are able. In the last

sentence, the future tense will be able should also be

changed to the present are able.

Instead, principals and teachers are able to use uni￾forms to build school pride and loyalty. Adminis￾trators and teachers are able to concentrate on what

they love to do most, teach, instead of dealing with

problems from children and parents.

Finalizing

Notice how the few remaining problems with transi￾tions have been cleaned up in this final version of the

essay on school uniforms. The body paragraph on

teachers and administrators ended with too strong a

statement—no one will believe that school personnel

will have no problems from children just because of

uniforms—so that statement has been softened.

Imagine a school auditorium full of alert children,

all dressed neatly in blue and white uniforms.

Imagine these same children happily running out to

play in their blue shorts and white oxford shirts,

playing tag, and flying on swings. Whether or not to

dress public school children alike has been the sub￾ject of much controversy in recent decades. Oppo￾nents suggest that requiring uniforms will stifle

children’s ability to choose, squash necessary indi￾viduality, and infringe on the rights of children and

families. Although there is some justification for

these arguments, the benefits of uniforms far out￾weigh the disadvantages. Adopting a uniform policy

will benefit parents, children, and the school staff.

A uniform policy will benefit parents. Uni￾forms save parents money. Parents will not have to

provide their children with a different matched set

of clothes for each day, so fewer school clothes will

be needed. Because uniforms are all the same style

and shape and usually very well made, they can be

passed down from an older child to a younger one,

or even sold. On a recent survey, parents new to

school uniforms estimated they saved up to $1,000

on school clothes per child the first year alone. The

survey also reported that 95% of parents attributed

an increased feeling of peace to the adoption of the

uniform policy. Children will have already agreed on

what clothes their parents will need to buy, so there

will be fewer arguments on this often touchy subject.

Not only are parents happy to see a uniform

policy in place, but their children benefit as well. If

you were poor, wouldn’t you feel badly if you were

not dressed as well as your peers? Children who

dress differently are usually alienated from cliques at

school and left to feel like outsiders. Often they are

teased unmercifully. Dressing in uniform eliminates

that problem. Instead, uniformed children feel an

increased sense of belonging that enables them to be

more relaxed and quiet in school. Children do not

need to compare their clothing with that of others,

so they have fewer distractions during their learning

time. Children like the policy because there is less

nagging at home, and dressing for school is much

easier.

–THEA WRITING REVIEW–

195